Manflu- a terrible affliction.

This is not cool. For almost a week now I've had a blocked nose, am not sleeping properly. I am keeping beechams and kleenex in business going by the amount of stuff I'm buying. Its got to be Manflu. I'm moaning as much as a man would.

A strange uneasiness

I don't know what has happened, what part of my mind or body is playing tricks on me but I feel really out of sorts at the moment. I'm drowning and struggling to keep my head afloat with the house, and spending time with the boys. On Sunday I have neither of them and spent all day doing nothing. I literally folded some washing. That was it, how fecking lazy am I? What is wrong with me? I've lost my mojo. I'm dreading going to college tomorrow as I'm really not feeling Psychology at all and am dreading Biology as I think I did really bad. I NEED merits and distinctions to get onto the midwifery degree programme. Even the writing of my personal statement is trying right now.

Remember, remember the fifth of november....

And the boy has been sent home with work he's not completed in class. And his report was a bit pants failing miserably in literacy yet he can read! Go figure! We have my godaughters birthday party to go to today and then I'm taking the boys to a fireworks display at Kent Life this afternoon. It will be the first time I've taken the boys together on my own and I have to say I'm really looking forward to it, gonna get us all dressed up warm with hats, scarves and gloves. They have a funfair and the softplay is open until 9pm.

Do you like lists?

I love making little lists for myself, they're mainly around household chores that need doing. I will also add something to list that wasn't on there that I have done just so I can tick it off. Anyone else?

Whats on your list today? My list is this:
1. Sort out the floordrobe
2. Go through Roberts clothes and get them on facebay/ebay/charity shop bag.
3. Put away my mountain range of clothing currently cluttering one of my sofas
4. Get dressed...yep at 13:05GMT we are still in our pj's.
5. Go to a halloween party in Ashford.

I'm seriously struggling with the work/college/mum/life balance at the moment and you can see this when you look at my home. Things are NOT good. I can only call it a temporary blip for so long can't I?

Know when I'm not wanted.

Just a quick ranty pants on here. I was going to go out with the young uns from work Thursday night and then thought I couldn't cos I'm skintos and then discovered actually I had some money so messaged one of the guys going out to find out where they were meeting. They said that they weren't going cos they had no money. Today, all over a certain social networking site there are pictures of all of em out having a good time. Ah well, I shall go back to being all serious and won't try and fit in thinking I'm still in my teens and early twenties when in fact I'm almost thirty.

I'm too serious

According to the young 19 year old I work with I am too serious!!! The fact I've been there for just over three weeks is another matter all together so I'm bound to be serious until I settle in a little and feel more comfortable. But then maybe it's because I'm that little bit older and have that little bit more respect for my superiors that I wouldn't tell em to go forth and multiply. Hey ho, they make me laugh and I know it's only a bit of banter but felt it important enough to share with all four of my followers. How sad am I?

Not such the perfect father after all...

I'm in a bit of a predicament, my ex known as twat again for now is being a bit of a erm well twat.

I asked if he would be happy to have Robert for me if I booked up to go away for my birthday next year. He agreed and said yes of course. I asked Sean the same thing and he said, yep, just let me know the dates and I will book it off work and take Joshua away for a week. So fast forward to the weekend just gone and he's pressuring me to meet the wife and then throws me the 'well when you're away next year she will be looking after him as I've got to work' card at me. I mean WTF? I would have thought any NORMAL man would actually want to spend time with his son but no he's pawning him off on the wife for the week. Fucks sake. Pisses me right off.....not only that but the last three weekends he's been down there and I've given him his swimming stuff he's not taken him. It's like he wants to put on the facade of being this perfect father when in fact he's really not. The novelty of being 'dad' has worn off. He wanted to go down to every other weekend having him from Friday to Sunday which at the moment I'm not prepared to do neither is it fair on Robert to go from seeing him every week to every other.

The blokes a fucking cock, end of.